If I were to update my facebook status, which is rare, it would say "Day two of cloth diapers - OH BOY!"
My baby hit twelve weeks yesterday, which everyone says is magic. I haven't noticed any difference except if possible MORE stubbornness when fighting sleep. I'm afraid he gets that from my side. Anything interesting going on? Guests? Oh hi! Let's talk! We had three people rocking and soothing him and each time he'd nearly drift off, that little nap would refresh him and he'd pop up smiling. I WIN AGAIN, SUCKAS.
What's that? You want a photo? OK!
So today's Reverb Prompt asks when it's ok to lie. I will draw from my experience as a painfully honest person, not because I am super principled but because I am an oversharer, and just really bad at knowing when to lie. So here it is for my own reference. For the love of pancakes, Jen, lie better.
1. When asked a very personal question it is ok to gloss over it or not answer in full. No one wants to know exactly how your stitches feel several weeks postpartum. Unless they do. Some people do!
2. When asked by one's boss about how one feels about work. For the record, the answer should always be overwhelmingly positive, include the word "excited," and if pressed, the word "challenges."
3. When discussing a mutual acquaintance one has a slight distaste for. It is just not necessary to share.
4. When your in-laws are in town, lies are not only handy, but courteous. This can apply to parent visits too. Lie your head off! Say whatever you think they want to hear and it will go just fine. They are too old to change. And if they make a suggestion, say "Huh! I will think about that!" Then do not give it a second thought.
5. When answering questions like "what is your weakness?" or "what do you regret the most?"You may think it is ok to let your vulnerabilities show a little, you may even think it makes the other person more comfortable! Wrong! Do not answer these questions honestly! It is a trap!
6. The same applies when you are answering writing prompts like "tell me about your most embarrassing moment." Because embarrassing moments are usually not cute after the age of eight.
Wow, it is frighteningly easy for me to write this prompt.
7. When asked how you are doing, if depressed. It will help no one! I haven't been depressed in almost a year, but in my experience a person can only help themselves, and no one will know what to say. The polite thing to do is say fine and how are YOU doing, or at least gloss over it extremely lightly so you can receive some sympathy or a hug if you need it, and then everyone can move on. (Edited to add: this reads weird, consider it a note to self. You should do what works for you! Do not listen to me! I am not a doctor.)
8. When admiring a pet or new baby, if necessary. Usually not necessary, but man, is it important to lie if it is.
My baby hit twelve weeks yesterday, which everyone says is magic. I haven't noticed any difference except if possible MORE stubbornness when fighting sleep. I'm afraid he gets that from my side. Anything interesting going on? Guests? Oh hi! Let's talk! We had three people rocking and soothing him and each time he'd nearly drift off, that little nap would refresh him and he'd pop up smiling. I WIN AGAIN, SUCKAS.
What's that? You want a photo? OK!
So today's Reverb Prompt asks when it's ok to lie. I will draw from my experience as a painfully honest person, not because I am super principled but because I am an oversharer, and just really bad at knowing when to lie. So here it is for my own reference. For the love of pancakes, Jen, lie better.
1. When asked a very personal question it is ok to gloss over it or not answer in full. No one wants to know exactly how your stitches feel several weeks postpartum. Unless they do. Some people do!
2. When asked by one's boss about how one feels about work. For the record, the answer should always be overwhelmingly positive, include the word "excited," and if pressed, the word "challenges."
3. When discussing a mutual acquaintance one has a slight distaste for. It is just not necessary to share.
4. When your in-laws are in town, lies are not only handy, but courteous. This can apply to parent visits too. Lie your head off! Say whatever you think they want to hear and it will go just fine. They are too old to change. And if they make a suggestion, say "Huh! I will think about that!" Then do not give it a second thought.
5. When answering questions like "what is your weakness?" or "what do you regret the most?"You may think it is ok to let your vulnerabilities show a little, you may even think it makes the other person more comfortable! Wrong! Do not answer these questions honestly! It is a trap!
6. The same applies when you are answering writing prompts like "tell me about your most embarrassing moment." Because embarrassing moments are usually not cute after the age of eight.
Wow, it is frighteningly easy for me to write this prompt.
7. When asked how you are doing, if depressed. It will help no one! I haven't been depressed in almost a year, but in my experience a person can only help themselves, and no one will know what to say. The polite thing to do is say fine and how are YOU doing, or at least gloss over it extremely lightly so you can receive some sympathy or a hug if you need it, and then everyone can move on. (Edited to add: this reads weird, consider it a note to self. You should do what works for you! Do not listen to me! I am not a doctor.)
8. When admiring a pet or new baby, if necessary. Usually not necessary, but man, is it important to lie if it is.
Love this post! Especially the "Wow, this is frighteningly easy" part! :)
ReplyDeleteAlso, nice title, BTW. ;)
Although I agree with most of your list, I'm going to politely disagree with number 7.
ReplyDeleteA depressed person needs social connection. If they feel like they are going to be a burden on their friends or family by sharing their feelings about their depression, they are less likely to seek help.
Maybe I just read it wrong.
In some situations it's okay to gloss over the question if it comes from a stranger like a grocery clerk. They are saying it as a social formality for their job. They don't actually care.
But I think it's okay for depressed people to answer honestly to their close friends and family.
I totally agree with you, Liz! I'm purely speaking for myself, in my own experience it has been more productive to "fake it till you make it," but everyone should do what works for them. I should have said so and thank you for pointing out other interpretations.
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